Ah Shit, Here we go again.......

Back in Pittsburgh and fuck do i hate it more than ever.Being at camp makes me realize how much i hate people in the regular world.(Im sure you can tell im not a people person) Theres so much shit thats happened here in the past that i just want to get away from and forget.Then theres people that are here i want to be close to but they just blow me off.

Getting to start over is so hard.When you think your right there and have your chance, this place sucks you right back in.

I have to get a job here and i really really dont want to.Having a job here makes it 10x worse.There are so many people without goals or ambitions here it starts to put you down and i cant have that around me all the time.Thats Not Me!

I wanna perform and get away.Either by myself or with a band.My brother really has his eyes set on getting a band together.Its his main goal in his life right now and Ive been asked to be included and that makes me ecstatic.The quicker and harder we work the faster i can get outta this place.I just have to work at 137% and not let him down.Im sick of doing it.

Then there are women......welll.......lets not get into that cause they never know what the fuck they want =)

Last Days in The Valley of Steel

Well my days here are getting numbered.Pretty soon i will have things to do haha.Office Depots Grasp on me is loosing slowly but surely.Thursday and friday will be my last days there and Im not complaining at all

So everything is starting to work out for once! About a week from now i will be stretching out my wings and heading to Oahu to visit my brother and Fewcha Sister in law.Definitely something that ive been looking forward to for a long long time.I think its good that i waited though because now everything has kinda set it self into place

After my fun journey there comes to a saddening ending,Ill be back in the valley for a few days before starting summer camp! AH! Im So Excited! Im really really happy that i get to go back this summer! I am going to probably work with the younger kids to switch it up because frankly i just wanted to punch some of the older inner city kids right in the head piece last year.Probably not the best thing to say about a Christian summer camp but it is what it is.

Not sure what I'm planning on doing after that.There is always that hope to go to Kapiolani University for a culinary Degree but we will just have to wait and see how that all pans out.

Also been messing around with some Photography since i busted out ye olde camera.Heres some photos from the "Acid Forest" Theme

UUGGGGGHHHHH!

This town is a bubble.No one leaves, no one comes in.Steel valley is a stick in the mud.I am so happy that i am going to be able to get away from here again!A certain turn of events has occur ed and has given me the opportunity to do just that.



I still dont know what I think of Office Depot.Most of the people there are quite fun, some are not, but I just feel like its not a place for me.I cant understand how people can make a career out of a Department store.My manager has worked at Office Depot for 16 years.I could never see myself stuck in a place like that.The job is ok though.I really like being a salesman and I am pretty dam good at it.I have yet to see any of my commission but they say i should get it all in the next paycheck.



So I have turned 20.I count it as living 1 quarter of my life.When i look back, I see it as my life learning experience and now i have to take all of the good and bad things that happened and make my life worth something.Thats why i am glad id didnt go to college.So many people I know have not been doing what they wanted to do at school the past 2 years and are either dropping out or changing majors.I still have hopes for schooling though!



SOOOO.....I get to head back to Camp Allegheny this summer! I am very excited about that.I had an amazing time last year and this year can only get better.Ive been asked to lead the worship band again this year and teach voice,guitar, and drama.I am going to be working in the younger boys village this year.Last year I worked with the older kids and boy was that an interesting summer haha.GOOD thing about working at camp is I make good money and I got a raise from last year.When your at camp, everything is there for you.Housing , food, activities to do to keep ya busy.Theres not much money spending.



I plan on trying to save enough money this summer to be able to enroll in the community college on Oahu called Kapiolani University.Im hoping to get a degree in Food Services.I think it would be a great idea seeing as how there is a million restaurants there and im sure i could find a job somewhere with that degree.I thought about other things like photography and writing but food just seemks like something I know i can do and do it well.



I need a life changing experience very soon.Being stuck here isnt going to get me anywhere.Thats why I am making an attempt to get out as soon as possible.I dont wanna be another stick in the mud...

Back To The Drawing Board

So what have i been doing?

I now work at Office Depot at the waterfront.I didnt think that I was going to like the job but I do. Some of the current employees are kinda getting irritated with me because ive been doing great on selling big price items in the store with an added protection plan.Whats great is that I get commission on all these things that I sell. I thought it funny when the store manager was explaining how they sell things there and im not gonna be able to do it right away.MY ASS! first day i was on the floor, I sold a laptop and a shredder, both with 2 year protection plans.Then had 2 signups for the in store credit card.I like this selling thing.I feel I am a very convincing person when it comes to things in this nature and it has apparently showed.

Im also employed at Children's Hospital of Pittsburgh.They are just waiting on my background check to come in.Then i will start my Orientation and Training for a transport job.Ill start at the hospital in Oakland and then be transfered to the new hospital in Shady Side.I feel like ill really enjoy this job as well.The supervisor of that depart seemed very impressed with my resume and my over all attitude at the interview which led him to hire me on the spot.

Im not sure how its gonna work when i start at children's.I would really like to work both jobs because i have morning shifts for both but training at childrens is 5 days a week for 2 weeks in the mornings.Office Depot isnt gonna fly for that.We'll see what happens

So ive been thinking about career options.heres a few ideas stirring around.
Ive always loved creative writing.Its a passion of mine that i constantly do.I hate reading but I love to write.Going for Culinary would also be a good choice for me.Ive always had the cooking gene in me.Opening a catering business would be a good option as well.

Theres still that dream to open a coffee shop, but its not looking to bright. The thing is, I was always told I could do whatever I wanted with my life, then i was told to start thinking of something else.Well that completely defeated the purpose of the first statement.

Ye Olde Buick Le Sabre is starting to act up again.I have another oil leak and the hole in the gas line still isnt fixed.AND I JUST GOT BRAKES ON IT 2 WEEKS AGO AND THE BRAKES ARE SQUEALING!!! WHAT THE FUDGE!! As soon as i start having money come back in, the car sux it all away.OH! and lets not forget the first ticket ive ever got since driving for a year now.The registration was up on the car but i had no idea.My gram still gets all the paperwork on the car and i paid her money for the registration and i was told it was done.Next thing I know, im pulled over on main street for a expired registration, a $117.50 ticket, and a court date at the magistrate on my Birthdate. FML.

Me and my friend mike are talking about a summer Fire hall tour of western PA.It would be pretty cool and would get us both alot of exposure.there would be 3 set bands, and every town we went to, we would add a band from that town to the lineup.

Id really like to record a professional studio album but that cost lots of money.I have 47 originals and I can definitely pick out the best 10 to make a well arranged album.Some of my songs just have that mainstream feeling.

Well, Im gonna go finish watching the Neverender DVD's (which are excellent I might add. Especially when Warren Haynes from Allman Brother/Goverment Mule comes out to jam on Welcome Home)

Til next time

The economy pisses me off

So on Feb. 12th, I quit my job at Gloria Jeans. I had many reasons why.

1. They were trying to cut me hours from my paycheck so they didnt have to pay me over time. They would purposely put 78 or 79 hours on my paycheck when i was getting 82 or more hours.Good thing i keep tabs on my hours and made those fuckers pay me.took em long enough though

2. I would open the store and the manager was suppose to come in at 10 or 11.He would never show up for the whole day and that would happen for weeks.I was told i wasnt allowed to leave the store to go to the bathroom or eat on the job or id be fired because i was going against "policy".I was working 8-5 everyday without a lunch break or bathroom break.

3.Sometimes when i was suppose to leave at 5, the other employees would call the manager and tell him that they wernt coming in for another hour or 2 and he would call and tell me id have to stay.with no option.

It got really old and the new manager was a complete asshole. I couldnt put up with it anymore.I was losing my appetite and not eating for days.maybe a little something here and there.i felt sick not being able to go to the bathroom or eat all day.

I stayed as long as i could.during the weeks before i quit, i was putting in applications everywhere and i wouldnt stop.I didnt care what the job was or the hours, i wasnt getting anything.After i quit i was awaiting calls from the previous applications.And im still putting in apps everyday waiting for someone to call.Its gonna be almost 2 weeks without a job.It sucks but i have no regret about quiting.I could do no more there.Everyone else who worked there with me, has quit in the past week and a half.They have no employees and theres just some indian guy working there that doesn't know what he's doing and a little blonde girl who apparently snorts coke.

I'm hoping to maybe take a trip to Hawaii to get away from here for awhile.Im just not enjoying my current lifestyle.I need a reboot.it helped alot when i went away to camp last summer.I enjoyed everything i was doing again because i didnt have one big constant.

Well heath ledger just won the oscar for best supporting actor.Im very glad he did.Its sad that he couldn't accept.He played one of the best movie villians ever.No one can top his performance.

Well onto another day..

epic pixst

Thrash Climbs Cannix

So where to Begin.....

I figured i would start something to write down things i was feeling because the only way I've been doing that is through lyrics.

Lately, life isn't feeling up to par with me.Its like I'm stuck in the mud.They say people sometimes need chances to start over and I def. do.There are a lot of haunting memories of the place i live in and i feel like its time to move on.Everything just isn't like it used to be.

When i was younger, I used to wonder why my brother had no friends.I couldnt figure it out.It always seemed like he was this great guy that people would want to surround themselves with.Now i'm starting to see what happened.As you get older, many people start to change (even yourself). But it depends on the way you change.Alot of people follow one path of change together like going to to college for 4 years.Others just get jobs where they start thinking about there 401k plan at the age of 18.Then theres me.

I had high hopes of attending college all throughout high school.I was stuck on going for a Music Education degree.I was planning out my Audition pieces, put my applications in to places i wanted to go and was very prepared.Until i get a letter in the mail that says "Sorry, we could not accept you because "College Board" did not send your SAT transcripts in time".......Well Fuck. All this work and preparation to go to college and the people that are suppose to send out your SAT's send them out late and fuck you over? What kinda system is that!?

I'm glad that happened though.It was about a month after that when i realized that i didnt wanna be a music teacher.IF ANYTHING, i wanted to be a choir conductor and just teach voice.Its kinda impossible to find a small degree for that.Then it got me thinking about what I really wanted to do. 2 things came to mind

1.)Become a salesman of some sort- I always felt that i would be a good salesperson.Not like selling clothes in JC Penny, but other things like realstate,timeshares, new products ect. I feel i have that edge and a way about me that i could make a sale no problem.I can convince people about anything these days.its just a trait ive acquired

2.) Become a Business Owner- This is where my hope lies.I used to have dreams of opening a guitar shop,a skate park, or a venue but lately its all come down to one thing.I wanna own my own Coffee Bar/ Cafe.Working at Gloria Jeans by myself most of the time made me realize this.I would work for 2 weeks where i would open the shop, make orders, stock shelves, clean up, make all the drinks, serve the customers, have talks with them, know what the people who come in everyday get, and feel pride in my work.Its the first time I felt full pride in what i was doing.Of course the managers a complete douchebag and shouldnt own the company, but when i ran the store it was alot different.People would come tell em that they where coming to the store and I wasnt there so they didnt come in.

People there always seemed to like my attitude and me as a person.I had my certain group of people that would always come in and talk with me for awhile.

-The old guy who came in at 10:30 for a medium regular would always talk about the weather.

-The 2 middle aged men who came in every thursday for 2 medium sport teas and always made fun of the indian owners

-the woman and man who came in everyday except friday would get a medium regular and a medium flavor

-the little elderly woman with the huge fur coats who got large frozen drinks with 1 less cookie cuz she didnt wanna have a sugar rush

-friday dave who was like rainman but gay and would keep asking the same questions everyday.

As weird as they all were,I wouldnt have liked my job if they wouldnt come in. And i loved the fact that you would gain a sort of relationship with the people.It makes me feel like that something i could do for a life time.I love making all the things at a coffee bar (and im supposedly very good at it).Ive been planning on how it would work for a long time.

I want the shop to be really retro.Kinda like TGIF in the sense that they have random shit all over the walls.We'd sell all your coffee/espresso items.Also have pastries,bagels,ect int he morn. and have MTO sanwiches throughout the rest of the day.There would be tables scattered about and a couch or 2.A book self with random books people can read and book mark for when they come in.Board games,WiFi, and a small performance stage where performers can go up and have a chance to promote themselves.

My dream place to do this would be Hawaii.Ever since my brother moved there it hit me that i'm not stuck here.I had this mind set that if you didnt go off to college or the military you didnt move away from home.Then he moves half way round the world and my eyes open.I think it would be a great place to open the business because its a tourist area.It wouldnt be very hard to get the ball rollin once you opened in that area.Of course your not gonna have crowds coming in a first because you have to establish yourself to the locals first.If a tourist asks a local where to get some good coffee you want your business's name to come out first.But with all the tourist traffic going by constantly, you'll be off to a decent start in no time.My hope would be to turn it into a family business.Its also been a dream of my moms to open a coffee shop.

I wish that she could move to Hawaii as well.I mean its all she talks about everyday.She would be alot happier with her life if she was there instead of the hell that she puts up with right now. She deserves to lead a better life.shes earned it.

Ive saved money for the first time and thats because i had a set goal.ive never wanted something so bad i saved money for it it till i had my mind set on going to Hawaii. Ive even been inviting friends from around here to go as well.Maybe I can convince people to get out of this place as well because Pittsburgh is such a dead zone filled with unmotivated and miserable people.I hope some of them consider it.We would all be going into it together to better our own lives.

I Hope i can get out of this place soon because its killing me.I just feel like shit being here.Im hoping for the best.I'll end this blog today with the words of my last fortune coffee in hopes that it will come true.

"Good news will come to you from far, far away"